MARTHA:
Hello my dearest, sweetest, kindest, most sensitive man.
I’m so glad all this drama is behind me now so that I can focus more of
my unbounded energy into us. Before I forget, click on the attachment
and see that Kuma and I really did get our pictures in the paper (Isn’t
he handsome?).
Now I have to fend off autograph seekers by stationing George out on
the front porch with a shotgun across his lap (Think Clint Eastwood,
“one more step and you’ll make my day”). In the yard is a sign reading
“Private Property Please Stay Away. Kuma is Resting”.
Now that you have seen the newspaper headlines the cat is out of the
bag. The jig is up and I must place my cards on the table and come
clean. You see my sweet butter lips, when you sent me your first email
I was deeply touched by the way your heart went out to the
distinguished gentleman you spoke of.
I sensed deep within you a kindness and loyalty you don’t see much
these days with guy like John Adams and Thomas Payne traveling the
country side crying for revolution. I was moved to tears reading how
generous a person you are by offering me a full 20% to do practically
nothing while you did all the thinking, figuring, and leg work.
Even though I was deeply moved by all you said I probably would have
declined your kind offer except that a week earlier my astrologer (who
Nancy Reagan had personally recommended) said that on that date I would
meet the man of my dreams and it would be a secret. And there you were
my cream puff. Now we’re secret lovers (kind of) just like the
astrologer said.
What touched me the most about your fine character is that at first you
said that you were not a pet lover and did not have animals…and that
did bother me, but then, bless your heart, you grew spiritually and not
only do you now care for and appreciate dogs, but hallelujah – you now
have darling Max.
Michael, I cried like a baby Barbie Doll when you offered to donate
such a large sum of money to my husband’s Crippled Children’s
Foundation.
Oh Michale, I’m so proud of you. When I asked for 40% instead of the
20% you offered I was just testing to see if you really did care for me
and you came through like a Nancy Reagan by compromising with 30% (I’d
have respected you less if you had not done some negotiating).
Look at me, I’m gushing, I know. Anyway, my dear, I don’t need nor
really want any money from your enterprise because I have more millions
than I’ll ever be able to spend in this lifetime and the money I make
these days is by way of high stakes ventures that excite me. But it’s
really you I care most about my dear. I think of you every waking
minute and want you in my life because I’ve never had a secret friend I
could tell everything to. Besides, the astrologer said you were the
man for me and there’s no point fighting fate.
I’m leaving this mad-house for the weekend to fly off to Montana and
spend some blissful down time at a minute-man silo resort with my good
friends the Cheney’s, Condi and the Powel’s.
You being a high ranking officer at a bank with lots of smart ideas
should think about how we could do some interesting investing as
partners. I have my own offshore account with Ansbacher (Cayman)
Limited so I can always get my hands on some quick cash to invest in
promising ventures.
I was thinking of perhaps doing a joint venture in oil exploration.
Oil’s at a 21 year high and countries such as Brazil, Venezuela,
Nigeria and Russia (although Yukos has a strong hold there) offer easy
pick en’s for savvy investors like ourselves. What do you think my
sweet Lolly-pop? I’ve got to catch a flight now, write soon my colorful
pee-pee cock.
-Hug-hug, squeeze-squeeze, kiss-kiss – Martha
NEXT: What will Michael’s reaction be to Martha’s duplicity? Will
he take the bate and initiate an oil deal – in perhaps NIGERIA?
This gets better & better, & I don’t get every reference. Most, but not all. Is that a real newspaper article?
Barbara,
I had set up a special email account to snag a Nigerian scammer, hence, Scamming the Scammer. I’m Martha, Michael is Michael living in Algeria.